Get your Kids to “F”ing Sleep

F is for fulfilling, people. But honestly, it’s a pandemic and if you need to swap out “fulfilling” with a less fluffy word, I’m on board with that too. I get it, you’re done.

You can love your kids to death but also want to throw in the towel, and it’s okay to have all the feelings right now. If you’re introverted like me, you need alone-time to re-charge. With the kids home (depending on their age), you might not even be able to go to the bathroom on your own and boy does that get old fast. Whether you are raising a child on your own or are in a partnership, we all need some recharge time at the end of the day that is 100% kid-free. Especially now. You know, time for conversations that don’t feature paw-patrol in the background or involve compromising with your teenager.

Connection time, alone time, wine time…time that is yours. This can seem like a long-lost concept for parents of young kids who just can’t get that “F”ing sleep. When they can’t sleep, neither can you, and so the circle goes ‘round and ‘round.

I want to help you get your evenings back. Let’s start by looking at some of the most common reasons I see for sleep deprivation in kids and teens:

Hormone Imbalance

Stress hormones, sleep hormones and blood sugar (governed by the hormone Insulin) do a delicate dance all day and night long in order to create the perfect sleep.

If a child isn’t sleeping well, this leads to blood sugar irregularity the next day (signs of this include food cravings, sugar addiction, mood highs & lows and frequent snacking). Blood sugar irregularity is linked to a low ability to secrete or respond to cortisol first thing in the morning (ie. the child who just CAN’T get out of bed), leading to imbalanced stress hormones. If a child is chronically stressed, anxious or has experienced trauma, melatonin can be out of whack too.

Melatonin is a hormone produced in the pineal gland of the brain that helps to regulate the sleep-cycle. It is made from the precursor tryptophan, which is the amino acid to blame for feeling “turkey sleepy” after a big holiday meal! Melatonin’s natural rhythm is affected by imbalanced nutrients (i.e. high starch/carb, low protein), environmental stimuli (i.e. whether it is light or dark outside) and also by the stress hormone Cortisol.

As you can see in the graphic to the left from Precision Analytical’s DUTCH test, cortisol goes through a natural rise and fall throughout the day. It should naturally rises in the morning to get us alert & ready for the day ahead without stimulants.

In chronic cases of stress, what may happen is a sharp elevation or blunt in something called the “Cortisol Awakening Response” (CAR), or in other words, how quickly or slowly cortisol rises after waking. Sleep deprivation can be linked to a low/blunted CAR. These young people can present with lethargy, depression, trouble getting out of bed. This kind of response can be linked to PTSD as well.

Even if the stress response is low first thing in the morning, sleep deprivation tends to actually increase feelings of stress, which leads to increased insulin secretion and resistance (ie. blood sugar imbalance).

Don’t worry, I’m about to connect all of this together for you:

When blood sugar experiences dramatic dips, a child will not be able to reach deep REM sleep because this kind of sleep requires glucose as fuel. If glucose is low, the child will experience restless/light sleep or wake up needing a snack.

Take Action by: offering 1 tsp of raw/unpasteurized honey before bed to charge glucose stores to help the body achieve deeper sleep!

*The test featured in this post can be isolated from the DUTCH PLUS at a lesser cost for anyone ages 9+. Contact me to see if it would be a good fit for your child.

Deficiencies

A deficiency in B vitamins, magnesium and/or good gut bacteria are all linked to poor quality sleep.

B vitamins all work together and so for that reason I rarely suggest isolated B vitamins be taken (with the exception of B12 in some cases). B vitamins help with mood regulation and blood sugar balance and have also been linked to better sleep (all due to the connections listed above when I talked about Hormones).

Magnesium is a mineral that many are deficient in (this is one of the imbalances I see in most Live Blood Cell Analysis appointments). Magnesium helps maintain good levels of GABA, a neurotransmitter that helps with relaxation and sleep.

Good Bacteria are what comprise the microbiome (the network of good bacteria in the body). It is actually the intestinal microbiome that release sleep-influencing hormones like GABA and even some of the body’s Melatonin (the rest is produced in the brain). The microbiome is often referred to as the “second brain” because it actually has it’s own nervous system, which signals the brain and nerves in the body! Brilliant, isn’t it? Ultimately, without supporting the microbiome by eating high-quality fermented foods, avoiding processed foods & sugar and reducing stress (and potentially taking a probiotic, depending on the situation), sleep will not be ideal because the gut can’t communicate properly with the brain.

Inflammation

Inflammation can be thought of as signs of: pain, redness, heat, swelling and/or itching.

Sometimes this manifests as tummy aches, ear aches, muscle cramps and more. Inflammation can have roots in food sensitivities, underlying infection, poor food quality and more. Inflammation causes a disruption in good gut bacteria and nutrients required for healthy sleep patterns.

If your child has inflammation due to food sensitivities, you may notice bed wetting (though, not always). This is of course, a sleep disruption which can take an emotional toll on both parents and kids.

Consider testing for food sensitivities if your child has nightmares or wets the bed frequently (after age 4 or 5). Cow dairy is a common culprit here, but other common food offenders include: wheat, barley, rye, corn, sugar, additives/chemicals, soy, chocolate, egg (whites specifically), shellfish, pork, pea.

To detect underlying imbalances, be sure to work with a qualified practitioner!

Environmental Factors

EMF waves & blue light from electronic devices, stress overload and lack of ritual are big contributors to dissatisfying sleep.

Simply put, darkness stimulates melatonin to kick in and help our kids feel sleepy at night, whereas light suppresses it. When the sun goes down, kids are often still glued to electronic devices, which emit blue light and trick the body into thinking it is still daytime. This suppresses the natural dip of cortisol and rise of melatonin, keeping our kids wired into the night.

Even when the devices get shut off, Electromagnetic Fields are constantly in circulation, buzzing around our kids delicate bodies while they sleep (think: wi-fi routers that never sleep, smart readers in your home, laptops and phones left connected to wi-fi, alarm clocks plugged in right beside your head). All of this is actively working while you sleep and this is really quite scary, as EMFs are linked to Central Nervous System and hormone disruption. In fact, there is such a strong link that in my clients with trauma I suggest unplugging wi-fi routers when not in use and even tossing the microwave! For more info, check out Dr. Magda Havas, PhD., who has dedicated her life’s work to the study of EMFs and their effects on the human body.

Ritual is the word I use instead of routine, because a ritual is time to be savoured and enjoyed. Routine sounds more like a chore. For example, my bedtime ritual for children I nannied looked a little something like: dinner at 5, electronic time for 30 minutes, dim all the lights in the home and turn down the thermostat, bath/shower, transition into story/reading time (depending on age), lights out. This was non-negotiable. And gosh did I ever see BIG behaviour changes. Sometimes, it really is the consistency of implementing simple steps. Simple, powerful steps that set your kids up for long-term health and success.

Tips for older kids & teens: use blue light blocking glasses if studying in the evening or scrolling social media. Ideally you will put boundaries in place here (as you would with younger kids), but blue light glasses can buffer some of the effects of light stimulation.

Well, there you have it! A nutritionist’s view on getting your kids all the way to “F”ing sleep! So that you can enjoy some “F”ing sleep too. Sending positive vibes into each and every one of your homes during this time. If something specific resonated with you when reading, please do not hesitate to contact me directly to see how I can help you even further!

Disclaimer: the information in this post is not to be used as medical advice and should not substitute the care of your family physician. Please seek medical care for any prolonged sleep issues your child is having.

With gratitude,